I’ve completed a run through of DN1 – it happened quick, and mostly it’s gone fine, though I think there’s too much ‘drama’ and emotion right now – and now I have to go back and address the final two or three things that Jamie mentioned needed sorting.
Firstly, the move from street punk to dealer happens almost overnight, and it maybe needs some gradation, some extra tweak to make it interesting/believable.
Secondly Mickey’s explaining the source of heroin imports needs flattening out a bit, it’s a bit too pat. He comes across as a bit to clever. Would he really remember all that? Maybe education on drugs is a recurring thing in school, every school he’s ever been to do some sort of drugs awareness thing, so it’s one of the things that sticks in his mind. A ‘portable skill’ along with art, sport, and lots of random info on Diwali. Ramadam and Gurpurbs.
Maybe the Hamlet thing too. Maybe he gives that explanation because, after reading the Sparknotes and watching Thug Notes on Youtube, he realised that discussing the Bard’s motivation would be easier than actually reading the play.